Questions warning its kinda long but plz read
Sunday, July 13, 2008
I felt really I dunno how to explain....my mind was full of questions...I even shed my tears a lot that day...that was on Thursday 10th July 2008. Am not sure why...I even had a long walk from Pasir Ris interchage to my house...the questions that appered in my mind was What is my life all about? I know its about Obeying Allah's command and hindari ape yg dilarang...and also "Inna Solati wa nusuki wa mahyaya wa mamati lillahi rabbil Alamin" Sesungguhnya Solatku Amalku Hidupku Matiku Kerna Allah Yg Satu" But did i Do tht?? every day 5 times I say that ayat....but did i mean it??? did i feel it?? what did I do?? have I done it?? NO!!! all I did was enjoying LIfe as a teenager...without really remember what is the purpose of life is....of coz my religion allow us to enjoy urself...but did I atleast say Thank You God for making my life wonderful? thank you God for meeting me with all those wonderful people especially in M.A.I??? did I?? no...what kind of servent am I?? what a weak servent am I to U God...please Forgive my sins....
I even thought bout people around me...especially Muslimah who wear thight cloths...and does not jaga their adab in public...I was really sad that one of my secular friends buat maen dgn pljr2 madrasah(wanita) it really felt that madrasah students(muslimah) pnya maruah really down...eventhough am glad that none was From M.A.I, but it really hurts to hear that kind of stuff from people...its like madrasah students (muslimah) really dont have maruah...mudah terpedaya tk tahu jaga marauah...am really sori to say that...am not telling which madrasah...but its kinda obvious among the madrasah students....yang mana bermataer dgn budak2 gangster...yg isap rokok...wht is this??is it cool for a grl to smoke?? in the eys of masyarakat its a hina thng to do. I know u may say tht smoking is makruh but!!! does it mudaratkan diri?? klau mudaratkan diri kan dh jadi haram,and is there any positive effect from smoking?? NO!!! u only feel relax,u cn do tht by listening to music or sleep,not only it mudaratkan diri,mudaratkan masyarakat juga,as passive smokers,passive smokers also cn get sick and die gara2 u all!!! and u are an educated people...yet u let urself go down....diberi izin utk pegang kat merata2 tempat padahal ianya bukan muhrim....and the best thing was u had done it!! yeah!! u did it!! and tk lama lagi u will be a mum...congrates!!! clap2 at such a young age!! wht the hell u doing??? abeh yg lelaki tu sanggup tanggung u?? tk kan?? dia lari kan?? klau tk lari pun cukup ke nafkahnye?? sedangkan duit sekolah masih mintak ibu bapa...ape ni??
Then I also thought about LOVE...I knw its not the time yet...I even dont wanna commit to love just yet...but like most teenagers...we do interested with the opposite gender...yes I know some of u know who I had fell for....but I dont wanna to hv any relationship with her...I just dunno love?? like?? crush?? admire her?? ergh!! I just wanna her to know tht and I dont wanna commit to love...it is just tht u know...I'll wait for u dear till u finish ur school....its kinda like tht...yah i know jodoh tangan Tuhan..but yah i just want u to know tht....
well theres a lot of things actually....but I guess dh panjang...well take care peeps...plz pray for my life guys...may Allah bless u all...amin...